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Pages: Maybe this belongs in psych fo... [1]
Author Topic: Maybe this belongs in psych fo...

Full Member
Posts: 3

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2011-08-10 15-45-08

Maybe this belongs in psych fo... but it's starting to feel like no matter how much I accomplish with my life, I'm still going to be insecure, because it's just too ingrained in me from my hood. It's like a weight I just can't shake off. Doesn't matter how much I tell myself I'm not a failure. Doesn't matter how much evidence there is right in front of me. I still feel like I'm doomed to fail and be alone because of it. Intellectually I don't believe this. Emotionally I can't seem to believe anything else, no matter who tells me it's not true.
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Posts: 21

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2011-09-21 21-05-13

PS: I'm sorry to be such a drag. I just need to talk this out a bit.
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    2011-09-30 11-17-00

    Are you in therapy?
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    Posts: 4

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    2011-11-13 12-12-41

    That's possible. Maybe start doing, rather than always thinking. Try to set small goals that you can achieve. Could be anything from making a meal to repairing something around the house, etc. Often, achievements are what build self-esteem.
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  • pilson

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    2012-01-06 4-48-09-

    Aw, now this is fantastic advice. Life's problems are best solved by living! And yeah, lots of ruminative self-examination can drive a person mad, ironiy. Slutty_Claus gets pluses from me!
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    2012-03-10 14-49-34

    Thanks Ms. P!
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    Posts: 13

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    2012-05-21 4-39-57-

    what happened when you were a kid? abuse, neglect, alcoholism? get into therapy, find support groups, find other people who feel the same way
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    Posts: 13

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    2012-08-21 7-12-29-

    and understand that nothing this enormous is fixed overnight.
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    Posts: 31

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    2012-09-20 4-19-24-

    That's true but... ...I've got this panic now about "running out of time." I'm too old for this. Every time I think I'm making progress I find out that instead I just understand my own lack of progress more deeply. I'm really starting to believe I'm never going to figure it out. And in a way I don't even want to keep trying. I just want to accept it somehow.
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    2012-11-13 5-39-08-

    can you be happy? or is it impossible?
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  • bramhall

    Posts: 41

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    2012-12-30 7-18-31-

    I know it's possible because it's happened at times. But it always comes und I guess I'm starting to think that those times were just delusions. and that I've lost my ability -- or desire -- to be deluded like that any more.
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    Posts: 33

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    2013-02-27 3-32-22-

    Life's forever in flux. It's not always gonna be good, but it's not always gonna be bad, either. You're thewho can create the happy medium.
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  • Libby

    Posts: 77

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    2013-03-21 11-34-04

    I guess what I'm trying to get at is that things actually *aren't* bad now. I'm not broke, my career is OK, I'm healthy, I have good friends. Yet because I can't seem to have a long term relationship work I feel unhappy and al And thosethings keep resonating with each other, throwing me into a downward spiral. I try not to let it happen, not to fall into it without a fight. But damn I'm getting tired of feeling like there's nothing else to life but "not falling."
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  • fernstrom

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    2013-04-26 19-15-56

    So you're insecurity is about relationships? Does you insecurity sabotage them? Is that what you're trying to say?
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    2013-06-27 12-58-47

    Yes, that's it. Sorry it took me so long to say that (laughs).
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    2013-09-02 8-21-33-

    Don't worry about it...I'm the same way You have to keep working at it. You'll get there. Sometimes you just have to suppress your insecurities and just freaking fake it 'til you make it. I'm not kidding. I'm doing that right now, and, honestly, it's working.
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    Hero Member
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    2013-10-09 2-03-10-

    I'm doing it too. I guess all the "faking it" is starting to wear me down. I want to BE it. Faking it isn't fooling ME anymore. Any rate, I guess I'm just having a bad night.
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    2013-10-29 14-41-52

    I'm starting to buy it, because I've stopped blowing off the positive feedback I get. Do you do that? Dismiss the good things that people say about you? Dismiss the good people that say good things about you?
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    Posts: 46

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    2013-11-12 20-41-01

    By lifelong habit I do. I've redoubled my efforts to change it. Last night someone gave me a compliment and I felt good. I tried to carry it forward into something important today, but it didn't make any difference. I was still as hapless as ever. whine whine whine...
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    2013-11-26 13-37-17

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    2013-12-06 23-54-05

    don't give up just don't overthink it, don't be obsessed with diagnoses, etc. just make it a priority to do things that make you feel good, happy, content with yourself and the world don't compare yourself to others give yourself a break lighten up
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    2013-12-13 16-15-49

    Parents were emotionally weak and I was at the bottom of the pecking order all through school. It took me years to stop believing I was the ugly fat kid, but I still act like it in my own head.
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    2013-12-15 23-31-25

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    2013-12-25 23-49-10

    change the way you think Set a list of goals Write down your accomplishments Remind yourself often your not a failure Eventually it will stick See a doctor if its real bad
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    2013-12-29 17-06-46

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    2014-01-02 15-46-11

    honestly - it doesn't matter who tells you you need to believe it yourself I know it's tough to do when it's been ingrained in you from hood - and it's not something you can do overnight it may help to talk to someone about it - you should feel good about yourself - everyone should
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